Listen to your guide to resilience and perseverance. Life is full of challenges it is within our ability to bounce back and to deal with things adequately.
Episode Notes
Resilience is more than the ability to bounce back. It is also our capacity to adapt in the face of challenging circumstances, whilst having a stable mental well being. Resilience isn’t a personality trait – it’s something that we can all cultivate.
Discover the fundamental belief that can guide your resilience and perseverance. Listen to this episode today.
0:06 Intro
1:04 Childhood story
1:50 Story lesson
2:15 Starting over
2:35 Be stupid and humble
2:50 How kids learn to walk and what you can learn from that
3:10 Be careful of your ego
3:38 Learn from the process
4:25 Notice the feedback and use it to your advantage
5:03 Recruit help
5:19 Are you stubbing your toe every night?
6:00 Develop a thick skin
6:11 Cultivate foundational belief for growth
7:05 Teach this one thing to your children
8:01 All problems have a solution
8:12 Self esteem and worth will grow
8:25 You can withstand anything that comes your way
8:57 Pretend everything is an experiment
9:05 Confucius
9:16 Post summary conclusion, take away
9:45 Cultivate resiliency
10:16 Outro
Transcript
When you try something once, and it doesn’t seem to be working How do you just give up when things go wrong in your life, do you keep trying will do you give up and go home.
Do you come back stronger more creative more insightful and try again, when someone does something to you something that hurts your feelings something that you didn’t like and you consider it to be bad. Do you just never try again. But do you stay for the fight.
Knowing to keep pushing annoying way to quit is two sides of the same coin. For this episode, though, we will focus on building resiliency and perseverance, a skill that can help you build belief that you can deal with anything that comes your way and you can always learn from it and get back to it. Welcome my friends to another episode from inside treasures.
My name is Phoebus and I love to challenge myself and those around me for the purpose of growth. This podcast is about helping you to heal to change and to grow. When I was a little boy, I used to play with Lego, and my brother was older than me, so I wouldn’t make something fixes spend all this time making it look the way that I wanted it being creative and all this stuff just getting lost in Lego Land.
And then a brother will come along and you would just bash it, you would bash it you’re breaking into pieces, and I would be frustrated at first. Yes, I would cry him there I would whine Other times I will say why did you do that, but he taught me something very valuable.
And that valuable lesson was perseverance. It taught me to get back on my horse and to keep writing, no matter what came my way, no matter what happened, no matter the frustration, the failure to anger was about me.
Because something new, again, having another go to help him become more resilient, it helped me build a belief that no matter what came my way I could build something new, something different something better than before. That thing that I had built and it’s gone now. Other a kid similar could completely start from scratch.
But this time instead of me getting demoralised and feeling sad about what I had built being broken. It taught me something. It taught me starting over. Because in life, a lot of times we start something, and we all have the obstacles of not starting but then we manage to start and then something happens along the way. And then we stop.
And we find it very difficult to start over. Learning to start over is a skill that we can apply in our life, anywhere. It’s about being stupid and being humble pretending as if this thing didn’t happen, and you can start over.
can start over and over and over again, we find it all before when you fall down just get up and keep walking. We’ve seen it with kids when they’re learning to walk, they take a couple of steps they tumble down they get up and they try again because they’re not thinking, try to take a step and I fell, thinking I’m trying to get there and this is what I need to do
keep having a garden, again and again and again until you win. Be careful of your ego. If you’re being driven by your ego your ego is driving you around. You’re not in control you have to take a step back and regain your control.
The main thing to remember is, humble, stupid, and just start over and over and over again, no matter what direction you’re going to matter what it is that you’re trying to achieve in your life, no matter the adversity and the things that keep pushing you backwards you keep pushing forwards. Just starting over isn’t always enough.
It must be something that will learn from the process, but you must learn from the feedback. Along the way, something happened while Was that something that happened, that was our feedback was action, and then there was a reaction.
Because a lot of times when we fail we’ve, we’ve, we just forget we get demoralised we focus on our failures so badly, and we forget to get the feedback, forget to learn how we can do that quickly we don’t have to sit down we popper the problem of failure for the next 20 years and say I’m never gonna do it ever again.
And that’s it because I did it once and it didn’t work out to you doesn’t explain stop dwelling on the fader and get to learning, and then move on. What did I just learn what is this happen, what can I learn from this.
Notice the feedback that you’re getting all the time, wherever we are, we’re constantly getting feedback. Repetition might be the mother of skill.
Without corrections, without adjustments, just doing the same thing over and over and over and over again. And that is very difficult to change our results of times we make the same mistakes over and over again, but the way that we learn is because at some point we notice what we can do differently. When we can get feedback when we notice, and look for that feedback we can be quicker.
When we ask him for help someone else might come in and tell us where to pay attention, how to change a little bit things. The differences can be tremendous when we make the right adjustments, when we pull the right lever so it’s about also finding the right lever is the right thing to change.
Remember that without getting the feedback without the corrections based on that feedback, we’re like the person who keeps stubbing their toes at the end of the bed every single night, and we do it again and again and again. And then we keep reaping the pain and the pain and the pain.
Yes we can keep having a god things. We can start over and over and over again but if we’re not learning through this process, then we’re working backwards a little bit. So one thing is to build the belief that strength of starting over no matter what and just pretending to be dumb and humble and just say I’m just gonna try again.
The other thing is like what just happened What can I learn, and through this process of doing things over again and learning from the feedback we develop something called the fixed skin. What’s the fixed skin and just like things are now getting through yes we might fail but instead of the usual being demoralised and the end of the world to become a little bit numb to that feeling.
will change the way you see yourself. What’s that foundational belief that we can cultivate foundational belief that we can all cultivate that I can deal with anything that comes my way, it’s building and cultivating that internal belief, and most of all remembering because these things are happening in your life the times when things were bad, and you found a way to deal with it. It’s also knowing.
You can do that at any time, because you have all the resources that you need within you. problem that I often see is that with fear. There’s doubt and insecurity, and all these things they play each other and they lead us to believe that to walk into this situation, or that what happened is we would crumble.
We shield ourselves we sealed our children from challenges from such misfortunes that they might come away and crumble them. By doing that were degrading our society, we’re removing the self belief in the future generation that they can deal with whatever comes their way, because we don’t want our younger generation to suffer, or perpetuate their suffering by not allowing them to learn from themselves not allowing them to think to strive to ferment in their own unique way.
Factor is, there is no growth. Instead we can teach them to understand and cultivate their foundational belief that they can deal with whatever comes their way. They can be strong enough that they can work it out, they can start over.
I can teach that to ourselves, of course, every time we deal with adversity. Every time we deal with fear, with doubt with insecurity. Now we can manage this we can cope with this with them, we can find the solution as my mother likes to say there is no problem without a solution, all the problems have the solutions and we got solutions.
We can find people who can help us get those solutions. You see when we’re cultivating those kinds of beliefs of self growth or self esteem just grows immensely. We’re able to see how even if we walk into a situation that can be difficult, or if something bad comes away.
We come with standards, we can deal with it. We can cope with it. We can be resilient. Even if we fall we can get back up. No matter the outcome, no matter the adversity, no matter the pain or the wounds. I know that I can move past this with strength, whatever this is.
I will not submit, I will not be defeated I will not bow to this, I’m resourceful, I’m powerful and I can move on. That’s how it’s always has been. And that’s how it will always be.
We’re coming from such a place of strength is very little that can happen that can movers and shakers become unshakable as my friend computers said our greatest glory is not in never failing and rising, every time we fall about taking the steps to look after your well being and automating the belief that you can do whatever you need to do that you can deal with ever comes your way actually lowers your, your stress.
First, you have in your life of things on my common decreases the fear that you might get on certain situations that you’re trying to walk into helps you go towards those challenges outside of your comfort zone to help you build that up and actually be strong because you know that no matter what happens, you’ll be able to deal with it.
Resilience is not just the ability to bounce back, but also the capacity to adapt in the face of challenging circumstances, and times. This is while maintaining a stable mental well being. resiliency isn’t just a personality trait that you just have or you don’t have is something that we can all take steps to achieve. It’s something that we can all cultivate from we can cultivate the beliefs that come with it.
The beliefs that can help you be resilient in life. I’m here to help you heal change and grow if there’s something that resonated with you something that you need help with something you need to be more resilient with and building those beliefs within you, give me a shout.
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Until next time, my friends let peace guide your life let love guide your heart and reason guide your thoughts.
Photograph by Karim MANJRA